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Situating and Leveling Up Identity Convergence
Shapeshifting Through Academia and Pedagogical Evolution
The Psychological Negotiations Between Authority Figure and Student
How Professional Expertise Shapes and Influences Graduate Studies
The Heavy Hand of Impostor Syndrome
Recommendations and Applications
The Heavy Hand of Impostor Syndrome
The complexity of navigating multiple professional identities intensifies the relationship between competence and self-doubt, manifesting as impostor syndrome for academics juggling varied roles. As high achievers, academics frequently experience self-doubt despite significant accomplishments and expertise (Bravata et al., 2020). While early research focused primarily on women's experiences with impostor syndrome, subsequent studies revealed that it affects all genders equally (Bravata et al., 2020). Notably, Cokley et al. (2013) found that impostor syndrome correlates more strongly with mental health concerns than with "minority status stress," which refers to the psychological burden experienced by individuals from underrepresented groups in academic and professional settings (p. 91), adding an intriguing dimension to understanding how academics managing multiple roles experience identity convergence.
Imposter syndrome, or impostor phenomenon, manifests across all three roles I inhabit. Wang and Li (2023) content that for doctoral students, imposter feelings are most linked to perceptions of role identity, which provides the foundation through which individuals reconcile and apply their thoughts and actions and make sense of their experiences. As a graduate student, it takes the shape of being surrounded by younger, sharper, more innovative students than I perceive myself to be. It becomes too easy to compare myself as a middle-aged graduate student to the younger classmates who seem further along than I was at their age. Because I am also a seasoned teacher and member of leadership, it feels unnatural for me not to understand concepts or to need clarification or help—after all, I should know the answers, shouldn’t I? As a teacher, there are always colleagues with more experience or better instincts, which makes me wonder if I truly belong. As an administrator, I am constantly surrounded by those with more experience. While I do my best to learn from these situations and individuals, I always question whether I truly belong in these spaces.
These examples are exacerbated by the fact that I am a minority woman. For me, Cokley’s research is particularly resonant because in my experience, impostor syndrome surfaces most strongly when I lack understanding or confidence in a project or task, affecting my mental health not primarily because of my minority status or cultural expectations, but rather through this uncertainty itself. While minority status undoubtedly plays a role, my self-reflection reveals impostor syndrome more as a manifestation of anxiety and stress. In my culture, asking for help or displaying anything less than absolute confidence is typically seen as a sign of weakness. Looking at all three roles I embody, this cultural expectation creates a self-perpetuating cycle—like a snake eating its own tail—where the very vulnerabilities inherent in learning and growth become sources of additional stress and self-doubt. In addition, I have found that shapeshifting between roles can invariably bring a hefty dose of impostor syndrome. This is especially true after the initial transition.
Spending extended time in one role makes it more challenging to shift into a new one with the same level of confidence, as self-doubt inevitably creeps in. In my department leadership role, I have engaged in numerous conversations about impostor syndrome's grip on faculty across all genders. I have discovered that shapeshifting, while initially presenting significant obstacles, can offer the benefit of returning to roles that have historically provided self-confidence and mental fortitude. For instance, when struggling with graduate student work, I might temporarily step back into my leadership or faculty role, reframing the stressful situation through my teacher or administrative lens where I generally feel more secure in my expertise–or at least, I do. Through this process, I attempt to transform my experience with impostor syndrome into a form of pedagogical evolution.
This leads us to consider how we might apply a pedagogical evolution lens to the presence and effects of impostor syndrome across our various academic roles. For students, impostor syndrome manifests in seeking validation of their belonging in their school or program (Parkman, 2016). While this affects both undergraduate and graduate students, the graduate student who is also a seasoned faculty member or administrator might find themselves less dependent on external validation.
This is where my personal experience provides insight. Though I struggle with intense impostor syndrome, I have found that graduate coursework is one area where I tend not to let it dominate. In my graduate student role, sitting in a classroom with students full of vigor, fresh perspectives, and wide-eyed passion can be daunting, but my extensive teaching and leadership experience puts me at ease. This is especially applicable when my classmates, many of whom are in their first semester of university teaching, share their frustrations and obstacles. I find myself organically shapeshifting into my leader or faculty role and offering anecdotes and advice from my years of experience. Perhaps I don't seek validation because I receive it through my classmates' undivided attention and eager absorption of my insights. Ironically, while I still experience a hefty dose of imposter syndrome within my faculty and leadership roles, those same roles help curb the imposter syndrome I might otherwise feel as a graduate student. The question becomes: how can we harness and share this experience while applying it to both our graduate work and our various roles?